


I Think About You A Little More Than I Should

by PhilTrashNo164



Category: Incredibles (Pixar Movies)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Sexuality Crisis, hopefully not as angsty as those two things make it sound?, questions about what love really is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 22:19:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhilTrashNo164/pseuds/PhilTrashNo164
Summary: Tony invites Violet to hang out with him and his friends at the mall for the first time. He has lots of girl-friends (not “girlfriends” - important distinction, she's totally the only one for him, right?), and that’s nice.She and Tony hold hands for the first time.That’s nice too.And then she learns that there’s so much more than “nice”.





	I Think About You A Little More Than I Should

Lisa’s curled her hair.

 

Or maybe she hasn’t. Violet barely knows her. Maybe her hair’s naturally like that, and she just flat-irons it every day.

 

(But why would she do that, when curly hair is, like, the coolest thing ever? Violet would kill for curly hair, but her mom was all “a _perm_ is a _perm_ anent decision, you can’t even decide whether you want Hershey’s or bubblegum at the candy store. It’s a _no_ ” god, her mom just didn’t _understand_ -)

 

“Is this OK?”

 

Tony’s voice jolts Violet out of her train of thought, tears her eyes from Lisa’s hair to Tony’s affectionate, slightly-anxious gaze.

 

She blinks.

 

Oh yeah. They’re holding hands. For the first time.

 

She nods at him, tries to smile encouragingly. Looks back down at their intertwined hands, squeezes once in reassurance.

 

Honestly, it’s nice. He pulled her back from the group so that they were walking on their own, and that was nice, and then his hand brushed against hers, and that was nice, and then his fingers grasped hers, and that was nice, and right now, it’s _still_ nice.

 

Her english teacher once described “nice” as an “unenthusiastic word, the kind of thing you say when you're trying to not hurt someone's feelings.” Violet can’t help but feel disappointed that holding Tony’s hand didn’t result in the shower of sparks all those movies said were for sure going to occur.

 

(Once, she could barely look at him without feeling like she was going to explode. Now they’re holding hands, actually holding hands… and it’s just…. Nice?

 

What’s wrong with her?)

 

“Tony, can you buy me a pretzel?” Lisa asks, twisting her head round to face them, and Violet goes right back to staring at her hair again.

 

“Just because I’m the only one of us with a job, doesn’t mean I get to pay for all your…” Tony begins, but Violet stops listening.

 

Lisa has such long eyelashes. And flushed cheeks. And a cute widow’s peak. And last Tuesday during lunch break she made some stupid joke about math and it made Violet laugh until she nearly threw up. Lisa’s good at art, and gym class, and- well, it would be quicker to list things she was bad at. Sometimes Violet just lies in bed at night and thinks about her.

 

_I want to be her_ , Violet decides. _She’s so cool._ _Why isn’t Tony dating her, instead?_

 

She pictures Lisa and Tony holding hands. Feels jealous. Feels relieved about the jealousy, ‘cause that must mean she still likes Tony, if she’s feeling like-

 

An image pops into her head: her and Lisa holding hands.

 

She has to take a deep breath. Even just imagining it, she can feel the sparks. She goes over the sequence again: Lisa smiling at her shyly, reaching for her hand, their fingers touching-

 

Electricity. It’s undeniable.

 

Maybe what she was actually feeling, was jealous of _Tony_ -

 

No. She can’t be a- she’s not feeling like-

 

She’s not having _those_ feelings.

 

_I just want to be Lisa’s friend, that’s all_ , she tells herself. Holding hands with your best friend was fine in middle school, why should high school be any different? Rules are dumb.

 

Her mom was always lecturing her about the importance of having people in her life that weren’t Tony. “It’s healthy,” she kept saying, “to have other friends, to have other people you love just as much as him. Platonic love is just as valuable.”

 

_See, it’s just platonic,_ she tells herself. _It doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s not_ going _to mean anything. I’m with Tony, and he loves me, and I love him-_

 

_(do you?_ another part of her mind taunts, but she’s not listening _)_

 

_\- and we’re going to stay together and after college we’ll get married and everything will be-_

 

“Violet?”

 

“Wha-?”

 

Tony boops her on the nose with his free hand, giggles. She knows she should feel some sparks when he does that, too, but again none come.

 

“Pizza?”

 

The rest of the group has stopped outside _Luigi’s_. She schools her features into something happy. “Sure!”

 

“What do you like on your pizza, Violet?” Lisa asks, dropping back from her group of girls to fall in line with Violet and Tony.

 

For some reason, Violet feels her cheeks burn, knows her face must be bright red.

 

“Uh, well, y’know, regular p-p-pizza toppings?”

 

Lisa’s got her eyes fixed on her. Lisa’s _talking_ to her, even _smiling_ at her.

 

Violet attempts to swallow, to continue to speak, “A little cheese, maybe some peppers if I want to p-p-p-pretend I’m b-b-being healthy, no p-p-pineapple, I-”

 

“Are you OK?” Lisa and Tony ask at the same time.

 

She makes some sort of squawk, blushes even harder. It’s taking all her willpower not to turn invisible and run.

 

(One day she’ll tell Tony she’s a Super. Now, though, is really not the time)

 

“No pineapple, huh?” Lisa appraises her for a moment, and then beams at her, raising her hand. “High five!”

 

Violet presses her hand against Lisa’s-

 

Sparks.

 

It’s like- it’s like- her whole body is on fire- and yet it’s good, it’s addictive, it’s-

 

“Vi, that was a pathetic high five! C’mon, try again!”

 

_Vi._ Lisa gave her a nickname.

 

(Not a particularly inventive one, but does she care about that? Like hell she does)

 

Feeling elated, she slams her hand into Lisa’s with all the energy she can muster. The resounding _slap_ can probably be heard several blocks away. Looks like she doesn’t know her own strength.

 

“Well, I _did_ tell you to do it again,” Lisa mumbles, wincing slightly. “Hey, Vi, I-”

 

One of Lisa’s friends calls her name, and Lisa runs off to them with a quick “sorry!”

 

“Pineapple on pizza is the greatest thing ever!” Tony exclaims, appearing not to notice that Violet’s brain has melted. “You’ve gotta try some, Violet! We can share a pizza?”

 

That’s another step forward in their relationship, isn’t it? Sharing food?

 

Sure, she stole his fries on the first date, but _sharing_ -

 

“Sure!” she says, forcing her mouth into a smile.

 

“Are… is everything... alright?”

  
Damn. Tony knows her better than she expected.

 

“I’m just… going through some stuff,” she says weakly.

 

“Well, I’m always here if you want to talk to me.” He smiles, untangles their hands to put his arm around her.

 

The rest of the group go “ _awww_ ”.

 

She mentally shakes herself. She’s just having a weird brain day. It’s nothing.

 

Very much _not_ looking at Lisa, she asks Tony, “Can we share garlic bread, too?”

 

Tony grins at her. “You just get cooler and cooler, Vi!”

 

_I love Tony_ , she thinks to herself. _I love Tony I love Tony I love Tony I love Tony I-_

 

_Don’t I?_

**Author's Note:**

> I was around Violet’s age when I first started questioning my sexuality, so I was like, hey, why not put her through all that angst, too?
> 
> (6 years later I'm totally chill with the whole not-being-straight thing, actually really love it, so don't worry)
> 
> Say hi on tumblr if you thought this wasn’t completely terrible! (I’m mysticalkoalamiracle)


End file.
